丘吉爾曾受邀在某校畢業典禮上講話。在校長冗長的介紹後，他只說了一句話：”永遠，永遠，永遠不要放棄。”(Never, never, never give up.)就走下講臺。這被稱爲歷史上最短的畢業演講。其實，這是一個誤傳。丘吉爾1941年在哈羅公學演講時提到過這句話，但過程卻並沒有這麼傳奇。
每到畢業季，各大高校都會請來名人給畢業生做演講。當這樣的演講多了，其內容不僅算不上傳奇，甚至可能難免俗套。本期我們就來一起看看吧。
【名人演講第一招：套近乎】
演講之初先要營造輕鬆的氛圍，演講者們深諳這個道理，於是各種開場方式悉數登場。
09屆的同學們!你們的掌聲在哪裏?(拉里·佩奇)
Class of 2009! I don’t think I heard you. (Larry Page)
謝謝大家，謝謝弗吉尼亞(主持人)那麼賣力地推銷我。我一度以爲她在介紹別人呢。(蒂姆·庫克)
Thank you for that nice reception and thank you Virginia for the incredible introduction. I thought some of them were about somebody else. (Tim Cook)
我想說的第一句話是”謝謝”。不僅因爲哈佛給了我這樣非同一般的榮譽，還因爲一想到今天的演講，我就緊張恐懼、茶飯不思，幾個星期下來竟然減肥成功。(J·K·羅琳)
The first thing I would like to say is “thank you”. Not only has Harvard given me an extraordinary honor, but the weeks of fear and nausea I’ve experienced at the thought of giving this commencement address have made me lose weight. (J.K. Rowling)
【名人演講第二招：自嘲】
自嘲幾乎是大部分名人演講的必殺技。不過注意哦，這種自嘲有時候可能是一種變相的吹噓。
我十分清楚你們現在坐在臺下的感受：聽我們這些老傢伙絮叨，老生常談。(拉里·佩奇)
I know exactly what it feels like to be sitting in your seat, listening to some old gasbag give a long-winded commencement speech. (Larry Page)
去年登上這個講臺的，是擁有億萬身家的小說家羅琳女士，她最早是一個古典文學的學生。前年站在這裏的是比爾·蓋茨先生，他是一個超級富翁、慈善家和電腦高手(nerd)。今年很遺憾，你們的演講人是我。雖然我不像他們那麼有錢，但至少我也算一個高手(nerd還有”笨蛋”的意思)。(朱棣文)
Last year, J.K. Rowling, the billionaire novelist, who started as a classics student, graced this podium. The year before, Bill Gates, the mega-billionaire philanthropist and computer nerd stood here. Today, sadly, you have me. I am not wealthy, but at least I am a nerd. (Steven Chu)
我爲今天在座的各位同學感到高興，你們拿到學位可比我容易多了。我值得稱道的也只有被哈佛的校報稱作”哈佛大學歷史上最成功的輟學生”了。我想這大概使我有資格代表我這一類學生髮言……在所有的失敗者裏，我做得最好。(比爾·蓋茨)
I applaud the graduates today for taking a much more direct route to your degrees. For my part, I’m just happy that the Crimson has called me “Harvard’s most successful dropout”. I guess that makes me valedictorian of my own special class…I did the best of everyone who failed. (Bill Gates)
【名人演講第三招：哭窮】
功成名就的演講者們肯定少不了要分享下自己過去辛酸的經歷，好讓臺下的學子們”開心開心”。
(從裏德學院退學後)我無法再住宿舍，所以只能借宿在朋友房間的地板上，我去撿5美分一個的可樂瓶，以此賺錢來購買食物，我會在每個週日走上7英里，穿過小城，到克利須那神廟，只爲晚上那頓一週一次的美餐。(史蒂夫·喬布斯)
(After I dropped out of Reed College) I didn’t have a dorm room, so I slept on the floor in friends’ rooms, I returned coke bottles for the 5-cent deposits to buy food with, and I would walk the 7 miles across town every Sunday night to get one good meal a week at the Hare Krishna temple. (Steve Jobs)
畢業7年之後，我遭遇了徹底的失敗。我那極其短暫的婚姻走到了盡頭，再加上失業，作爲一個單身母親，我淪落到窮困潦倒的境地，就差無家可歸了。(J·K·羅琳)
A mere 7 years after my graduation day, I had failed on an epic scale. An exceptionally short-lived marriage had imploded, and I was jobless, a lone parent, and as poor as it is possible to be in modern Britain, without being homeless. (J.K. Rowling)
我那時什麼工作都做，剝過牡蠣、做過迎賓、酒保、服務員、粉刷房子、賣吸塵器，我完全不知道自己想做什麼。我只想隨便找個工作餬口，能有錢付得起房租就行。(艾倫·德傑尼勒斯)
I did everything. I shucked oysters, I was a hostess, I was a bartender, I was a waitress, I painted houses, I sold vacuum cleaners, I had no idea. And I thought I’d just finally settle in some job, and I would make enough money to pay my rent. (Ellen DeGeneres)
【名人演講第四招：挫折與抉擇】
幾乎每個成功人士的`背後，好像都至少有一次面臨挫折和抉擇，然後絕處逢生的經歷。
[挫折篇]
我等待着希望聽到蔡爾茲教授告訴我我的論文寫得多麼好。但他沒有。於是等了45分鐘後，我終於開口問，”那你怎麼評價我的寫作呢?” “這麼說吧，”他說。”千萬不要靠這個謀生。”(邁克爾·劉易斯)
I listened and waited for Professor Childs to say how well written my thesis was. He didn’t. And so after about 45 minutes I finally said, “So. What did you think of the writing?” “Put it this way,” he said. “Never try to make a living at it.” (Michael Lewis)
那一年，我被炒了魷魚。你怎麼可能被自己創立的公司炒魷魚?是這樣的，在蘋果快速成長的時候，我們僱了一個我覺得很有天分的傢伙和我一起管理公司，最初幾年，公司運轉得很好。但後來我們對未來的看法發生了分歧，最終吵了起來。面對不可調和的分歧，董事會站在了他那一邊。(史蒂夫·喬布斯)
And then I got fired. How can you get fired from a company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did, our Board of Directors sided with him. (Steve Jobs)
那時我想，最慘的會是什麼呢?也就是失業吧。結果，我真的失業了。我的節目在做了6年後，沒有告知我就停播了，我看了報紙才知道。家裏的電話3年沒有再響過，沒人找我做節目，沒人願意提及我。(艾倫·德傑尼勒斯)
And I thought, “What’s the worst that could happen? I can lose my career.” I did. I lost my career. The show was canceled after 6 years, without even telling me, I read it in the paper. The phone didn’t ring for 3 years. I had no offers. Nobody wanted to touch me at all. (Ellen DeGeneres)
[抉擇篇]
我當時的東家康柏公司是當時全球最大的個人電腦生產商。我諮詢一位CEO朋友的意見，他堅定地說，我腦袋被驢踢了纔會爲了蘋果(當時還是一個很小的公司)離開康柏。(蒂姆·庫克)
My employer at the time, Compaq Computer, was the largest personal computer company in the world. One CEO I consulted felt so strongly about it. He told me I would be a fool to leave Compaq for Apple (a small company then). (Tim Cook)
我打電話給我父親，告訴他我要辭掉這個百萬美元的工作來寫一本只有4萬美元預付款的書。電話那邊沉默了很久。他說：”也許你該再考慮一下。”我根本不需要考慮。(邁克爾·劉易斯)
I called up my father. I told him I was going to quit this job that now promised me millions of dollars to write a book for an advance of 40 grand. There was a long pause on the other end of the line. “You might just want to think about that,” he said. I didn’t need to think about it. (Michael Lewis)
16年前，我萌生了創辦亞馬遜的想法。那時我剛剛30歲，結婚才1年。我告訴妻子想辭去工作，然後去做這件瘋狂而且很可能失敗的事情。她告訴我，我應該放手一搏。(傑夫·貝索斯)
I got the idea to start Amazon 16 years ago. I had just turned 30 years old, and I’d been married for a year. I told my wife that I wanted to quit my job and go do this crazy thing that probably wouldn’t work. She told me I should go for it. (Jeff Bezos)
【名人演講第五招：溫情迴歸】
每當提到自己的家人，演講者們都是充滿自豪感和溫情的。此情此景，常常令人動容。
我父親是如此的充滿生命力，與他在一起做任何事都是一種探險。(蘭迪·波許)
My dad was so full of life; anything with him was an adventure. (Randy Pausch)
很久以前，1962年的寒冷9月，這座校園裏有一家史蒂文消費合作社，學生志願者負責打掃廚房的天花板。想象這樣一幅場景：一位名叫格洛里亞的女大學生，爬上了高高的梯子，努力地打掃那髒兮兮的天花板。另一位名叫卡爾的寄宿生站在地上，對此情此景欽佩不已。這是他倆的初次邂逅。他們就是我的父母。(拉里·佩奇)
A long time ago, in this cold September of 1962, there was a Steven’s co-op at this very university. That co-op had a kitchen with a ceiling that had been cleaned by student volunteers. Picture a college girl named Gloria, climbing up high on a ladder, struggling to clean that filthy ceiling. Standing on the floor, a young boarder named Carl was admiring the view. And that’s how they met. They were my parents. (Larry Page)
我得到諾貝爾獎的時候，我想我媽媽會高興。但是我錯了。消息公佈的那天早上，我給她打電話，她聽了只說：”這是好消息，不過我想知道，你打算什麼時候來看我?”(朱棣文)
When I was awarded a Nobel Prize, I thought my mother would be satisfied. Not so. When I called her on the morning of the announcement, she replied, “That’s nice, but when are you going to visit me next.” (Steven Chu)
【名人演講第六招：引經據典】
他們演講時說的話經常被我們拿來當勵志名言，但其實呢，他們自己也需要勵志名言。
電影《我的朋友叫哈維》中，斯圖爾特扮演的艾爾伍德說得很對。他說：”多年前，母親曾對我說：活在這個世界上，你要麼做一個聰明人，要麼做一個好人。”我做聰明人已經好多年了。但我推薦你們做好人。(朱棣文)
Jimmy Stewart, as Elwood P. Dowd in the movie “Harvey” got it exactly right. He said: “Years ago my mother used to say to me, ‘In this world, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant.’” Well, for years I was smart… I recommend pleasant. (Steven Chu)
17歲的時候, 我讀到一句話: “如果你把每一天都當作生命中最後一天去生活的話,那麼有一天你會發現你是正確的。”"記住你即將死去”是我一生中遇到的最重要箴言。它幫我做出生命中的重要抉擇。(史蒂夫·喬布斯)
When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. (Steve Jobs)
他(喬恩·史諾地)告訴我，給人們足夠的時間，人人都會有讓你驚訝和歎服的一面。他說，當你對別人怨惱憤怒時，你只是還沒有給他們足夠的時間。(蘭迪·波許)
One of the things he (Jon Snoddy) told me was to wait long enough and people will surprise and impress you. He said when you’re pissed off at somebody and you’re angry at them, you just haven’t given them enough time. (Randy Pausch)
最後，本文將以這些演講者原創或引用的語錄作爲結束語：
Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish.
求知若渴，虛心若愚。(史蒂夫·喬布斯引用凱文·凱利)
Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted.
經驗是你求之不得後的收穫。(蘭迪·波許)
Never lose the child-like wonder.
永遠不要失去孩童般的好奇心。(蘭迪·波許)
Your critics are your ones telling you they still love you and care.
批評你的人是在告訴你他們仍然愛你關心你。(蘭迪·波許)
As is a tale, so is life: not how long it is, but how good it is, is what matters.
人生就像故事：不在於長短，而在於質量，這纔是最重要的。(J·K·羅琳引用塞內加)
Insanity is doing the same things over and over again and expecting different results.
精神錯亂是指一遍遍地重複卻期待不一樣的結果。(蒂姆·庫克引用愛因斯坦)
Be true to yourself and everything will be fine.
做真實的你，一切都會沒事的。(艾倫·德傑尼勒斯)